When parents say, “I trust my teen,” I laugh….

When parents say, “I trust my teen,” I laugh…. I currently have 3 Teenegers in my home my almost 16 year olds , my 13 year old niece joined us for the holiday .. and while having a conversation with them , one of them said “mum but you should trust us nawww” I told them that our parenting doesn’t work on “trust” and hear say … Trust is a gift we give our children, but it cannot replace guidance, structure, and accountability. Think of it this way: You trust your teen to drive one day, but you don’t just hand them the car keys at 13 and say, “I trust you, go ahead.” No you guide them, train them, set rules, watch their progress, and then trust grows stronger. Teens often assume that parents “just believe whatever they hear” or act only out of suspicion. 📌Trust is important, but it must be matched with accountability. I trust you but you must be accountable 📌Hearsay isn’t enough choices and patterns matter more than gossip or assumptions. We dont assume we build systemses … 📌Parenting is active, not passive you don’t just “hope for the best,” you guide, check in, and set boundaries. When you do that; it helps them see that your role is not to “police” them out of distrust, but to protect and prepare them. You could even use an analogy they’d relate to: “Imagine your school said, ‘we trust you, so no exams, no assignments, just vibes.’ You’d fail, not because you’re bad, but because trust without checks doesn’t help you grow.” Trust without accountability = negligence. Teens are still learning. They need boundaries. Trust must be earned and nurtured. It grows from consistency, responsibility, and honesty. Trust is not blind. Saying “I trust my teen” without being involved in their online life, friends, habits, or choices is leaving them unprotected. The real tool is guided trust: You trust your child enough to give them responsibility.? You stay involved enough to correct and protect them, You balance freedom with accountability. “I don’t just trust my teen with the internet. I guide them, I ask questions, I set limits, I check in. My trust is not a replacement for parenting it’s a result of intentional parenting.” Even the bible say … “The heart is deceitful above all things…” (Jeremiah 17:9). Even adults need accountability, how much more teenagers? That’s why you as a parent need to be guided ans accountable and that’s what we provide in the inner circle The Intentional Parent Academy Send us a chat NOW +234 703 639 3160 And join the intentional Parent Academy inner circle program and thank me later Meanwhile in the other news .. I now wear sneakers heels anytime I am with the twins 😂 So I won’t look so short 😂😂😂 ahhh. Be Intentional ©️ Wendy Ologe Africas Number One Parent Coach #wendyologe #africasnumberoneparentcoach #theintentionalparent #theintentionalparentacademy #intentionalparenting #parentingtips #parenting #motherhood #childhood #fatherhood